There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
