i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
