i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize