I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize
