Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
