so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
did you just send me my own nude
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
