I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
