She's the barista slut.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
