your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
