absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
wakey wakey hands off snakey
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Randomize
