you would pick up someone in the library
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
