dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
