Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
