He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Your tits are I can't wait for
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
