what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Drunk is not a location!
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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