I would go down on you faster than GM stock
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
