and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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