I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
