Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize