This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
