just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
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