this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
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