She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Randomize
