would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
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