Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
