Christians are straight up FREAKS
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
it's like heaven, but drunker
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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