i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
