Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
