also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
