I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize