Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
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