im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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