what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
