if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
