i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Randomize
