He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Randomize
