I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize