This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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