where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
i already hear my dad disowning me
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
