i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
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