so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
