Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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