no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
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