hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
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