So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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