this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
