Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
