Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Even my vagina gasped.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize
