the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
COCAINE IS GR8
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