I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
