please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Randomize
