Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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